“All of life is a process of deciding Who You Are, and then experiencing that.”
– Neale Donald Walsch, Conversations With God, Book 2
Life is often likened to a journey. Change is constant and the only constant seems to be change. The days whizz by and the seasons change. Along with all of this, who we are and what we want is also changing. What I want now – or what makes me happy now – are not necessarily the things that I craved when I was a toddler or a teenager. Come to think of it, it’s not even what I wanted a year or two ago!
But underneath all of that, there is one common theme: “I want to feel happy”. And this brings us back to the point that happiness is available to us NOW and that we don’t have to wait until Santa pays us a visit.
So how do I feel happy now when I know that Santa hasn’t yet been? When I know that my stocking is still empty? When the gap between where I am and where I want to be seems to be as big as the Grand Canyon?
I say things to soothe myself and make peace with where I am right now (thank you, Abraham).
I say “And this too shall pass”. I look back and remind myself of all the times when I got exactly what I wanted (or something even better). I remind myself that everything has a gestation period and that all things come to fruition at the right time. I do what I can do right now and as for the rest, I trust. I believe that it is being done and that it is on its way.
Learning to make peace with where I am has helped. A lot. I am still learning and practising, because I can get frustrated at times. Still.
But like everything else, it keeps getting easier and easier the more I do it. I also feel happier and lighter for it. So I know it works.
It doesn’t have to end there. I have learned that there is also ‘making peace with the past’. That has been a biggie. Letting go of baggage is an awesome feeling. Forgiving myself and others and letting go feels … just so liberating. I don’t have to think about those things or give them my time and energy anymore. It’s like clearing out a closet or de-cluttering. You are left feeling cleansed and light. And now, there is space for new and better things to come in. There is room for hope and positive expectation.
Another thing – there are no mistakes. All there ever is, is learning and evolving. There’s no need to beat up on yourself or anyone else. We all did the best we could with what we knew back then. That is the most that could be asked of anyone. Let. It. Go.
And here’s the clincher: your journey is what makes you who you are. Your setbacks, ‘mistakes’ and ‘disasters‘ can also be your biggest gifts: bringing new opportunities; growth and strength as a person; confidence in your ability to handle what life throws at you; knowing who your true friends are; your ability to empathise with others and feel their pain; your ability to help and serve others. All of these things come from your life’s journey. Embrace it. Embrace it all – even the parts that sucked. It has made you who you are and who you are is beautiful!
I will leave you with this quote which says it so much better than I ever could:
“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.”
– Elisabeth Kubler-Ross