“That which is like unto itself is drawn.”
Abraham (Abraham and Hicks)
“We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures.”
– Thornton Wilder
I had often heard (and read) how appreciating a person can help improve our relationship with that person. I had a powerful demonstration of the truth and power of this principle last night.
I had spend the entire day with my daughter Dakota, while my wife Shani had been away at work and to be honest, it had taken its toll on me. Dakota is usually quite well behaved and we have a fairly good routine going, so taking care of her is never a problem. In fact, most days we end up having a blast. Yesterday was different. Maybe it was because I was feeling tired and irritable to begin with, but she was ‘testy’ and non-cooperative with pretty much everything. Getting her changed was an ordeal and meal times were an absolute struggle (and for all you Law of Attraction believers, yes, I believe I created these experiences myself).
Anyway, I summoned what little energy and will-power I had left in order to get our dinner ready. Yet, when it came to her dinner, Dakota was far from interested. She was so busy playing and messing about that I gave up trying to feed her. My wife, who’d done a day’s work and a commute to and from the City, had to step in and take over.
By bedtime Dakota and I were not the best of friends.
I felt bad. I felt like I had failed that day. Going to bed with negative thoughts was like accepting defeat in my eyes. And, because I believe in the Law of Attraction, I also felt like I had set myself up for an even tougher time the following day (as annoyance and irritation would attract more of the same). Then it happened.
We were going through our bed time ritual of reading through some things we were grateful for and some things we were giving thanks for in advance (a practice which we believe helps bring about the desired outcomes) and I began to notice just how adorable my little daughter was. I started to notice how her face changed with the different things that were being read out (by my wife). I noticed just how animated she would become at times. I noticed how cute she was in her pink pyjamas and on it went… In noticing all these nice things about my daughter, I was in effect ‘appreciating’ her.
‘Appreciation’ in the sense that I am using it here, means looking for the positive aspects of a particular person or subject.
In appreciating my daughter, I had shifted my focus from being critical of her. In the process, my feelings of anger and irritation had become replaced with ones of love and adoration. This also had the effect of making me feel less tired and stressed out.
That would have been a great thing in itself, but the Universe is so good at delivering experiences which match the ‘vibration’ that we send out that I was in for a very pleasant surprise. When we had lights out, Dakota actually asked to lie next to me – something she has never done before. She always chooses to sleep next to her Mum, but here she was, asking for her Dad and I was simply over the moon! So she lay next to me, while we played some youtube clips of our favourite inspirational talks and she fell asleep in my arms – something that hasn’t happened since she was an infant.
If you had told me just thirty minutes before, that Dakota would ask to be next to me and that she would fall asleep in my arms, I would have said that you’d have to be joking – because it hadn’t really happened before and more so, because of the way our day had gone. Yet, here we were….
Appreciating my daughter (instead of focussing on the difficulties I’d experienced with her during the day) had shifted my energy in a full 180 degrees… and it resulted in something delightful and completely unexpected. And yet again, I was led to conclude that “This stuff works!” and that “This stuff is powerful!’
I invite you to give it a try sometime and tell me how you get on.